Middle Finger Magic

“Why do you give people the bird all the time?”


My dad doesn’t understand and thinks I’m just another kid going through troublesome seventeens. He thinks I need help finding the right path. He asks but then never accepts the answer. He never knows when I flip the bird and he isn’t looking.


I was born special. My middle finger is the catalyst to something magical. Something that is unexplained. My dad doesn’t believe in my middle finger powers. My mom just laughs and thinks it’s a phase. But I know it’s magic.


One afternoon when I was seven, I got in trouble for peeing on the floor instead of in the toilet. An hour later, I was still upset and saw a driver showing someone the bird on television. I shot the bird at the television, and the television screen went blank. Instantly, at that point, I knew I was special.


Over the year’s different events happened almost every time I gave someone the finger. When I’m happy or in a good mood, good things happen. When I’m mad, or in a bad mood, bad things happen.


On my thirteenth birthday, my Mother and I went to Save-N-Rite to buy cake and ice cream. While checking out, a nice old lady gave me a tootsie roll so I happily gave her the finger. I guess she didn’t believe in middle finger magic either; she slapped the candy out of my mouth.


The magic also works on me. If I think positive and give myself the bird in front of a mirror, good things always follow. One time, I found a twenty-dollar bill. Another time I almost fell, but caught myself before falling in front of a car. I even helped someone find their lost cat once.


I use to flick off Mom and Dad all the time wishing them luck. My dad didn’t believe that three promotions, two raises, a reduced mortgage payment, and finding that one hundred-dollar bill was related to my middle finger magic. I got grounded every time I shot him the bird.


My mom gets angry every time it’s directed at her. She always ends up finding an amazing deal at the mall, or she would suddenly find her keys. One time she even had her period end abruptly. She was happy about that.


One time my dad yelled at another driver for cutting him off in traffic. So I flicked the other driver off and his tire blew out a few miles down the road. We saw him parked on the side of the road kicking his tire. I was still upset and flicked him off on the way by, and he fell in the mud.


As I grew older, I realized that most people responded negatively to being shown the bird. Whether I used my powers for good or evil. Over time I started hiding my middle finger salute as best I could when my intentions were good, and only showing it when I meant it negatively. The energy can transfer through car doors and walls. So, I can flick someone or something off from a distance, hide it, and still have the desired effect. Sometimes, my dad will see me flicking someone off through the car door, and roll his eyes.


When I turned eighteen, I could feel my middle finger getting stronger. I know it doesn’t work unless I’m in the right mind set, but I have the power to bless or curse anyone. This is a power I take seriously, and intend to use it for great things.


College held a great deal of surprises for me. Flipping the bird was harder to hide in my dorm. This led to several situations involving me getting my ass kicked. It didn’t seem to matter whether my intentions were good or bad. No one believed in my magic. At this point, I stopped trying to explain it to other people.


I even joined the military for a brief period. In basic training, I flicked off the drill sergeant for yelling at me and he fell in front of the whole squad. He made me do a hundred pushups for that.


The older I got, the less tolerant people seemed to become regarding my gift. No one believed me when I told them. This hardened my heart, and started causing me to use it more with negative intentions. Anytime anyone pissed me off, or was rude to me, I thrust out my middle finger and waved it in their face causing chaos all over town.


Eventually, I met a girl, Catarina. I really liked this girl. She had long shimmering black hair down to her hips, and sparkling brown eyes. She was thin and almost as tall as me. She adored me, but disliked my power. At first, she thought it was a bad habit that she intended to break.


I loved her so much, that I told her the truth. The entire truth. She was the first person to truly believe me, especially after a few times of me proving it, which was not hard. Her inspiration encouraged me to become a better person and stop using it for dark reasons. She made me promise that I would never flick off anybody again for negative purposes.


I agreed without hesitation. She supported my abilities. I only use it for good now. Even when people upset me, I think positive so they will have blessings. Catarina is the greatest blessing in my life.


The first time we made love I used my middle finger magic on her. She said it was magical and as soon as we finished, she went to the store. She returned fifteen minutes later with a lottery ticket.


We’re sitting together now watching the lottery drawing. When the first number matched, she grinned. I flicked her off and she laughed, outright pushing me back to the bedroom as the rest of our numbers were announced. The winners would be entered for the mega prize. I flexed my finger.

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